Wednesday, August 31, 2005

The Best Ever?

Florida Marlins rookie Jeremy Hermida should retire at 21. Right now he would have perfect career numbers and a case to make that he is the best player ever in the majors.

You see, tonight he hit a grand slam in his very first at-bat in the bigs. According to the Baseball Almanac, only one other player has done that, Bill Dugglesby in 1898. But Dugglesby couldn't let well enough alone and went on to mediocritize what started out as a perfect career.

What more do you have to prove Hermida? Why take the risk? There's nowhere to go from here but down.

Wait, why are you pulling on the batting gloves again?! Hold up buddy, I won't let you do this to yourself.

Hey come back here! There's nothing for you in that batter's box.

No! Don't swing that bat! Arrgghhh!

Monday, August 22, 2005

The Bossman Liveth

As many of you know, I have just returned from a month-long sabbatical in Outer Mongolia, far from the requisite wireless hotspots needed to share with you my daily joys.

I have returned to find the A's offense back in a funk (certainly not one of my joys). Last time, I got results by demanding Ken Macha's job. So let's try that one again.

Meanwhile, the Giants have resorted to holding a different theme night for every ethnic group in the City to boost attendance. It's pretty sad, though I do find myself a little curious as to what Italian Heritage night at SBC Park might look like.

In other news, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers play at week's end with the Black Crowes at the Greek Theatre in Berkeley. My good friend Terrence Goodwin III in New York says if I miss this show that I'll never be welcome in the same room with him again.

In other news, Kanye West releases a new album next week. And as if we needed another reason to like this guy, in a recent MTV interview he calls for an end to discriminating against gays, especially in rap music. He admits to doing so himself in the past, talks about why he did it, and explains why he was wrong. Far more courageous for a rapper than it was for Eminem to perform with Elton John.

Meanwhile, the Republican party is splintering in terms of support for George W.'s war. Republican Senator Chuck Hagel is speaking out a lot lately, showing himself to be among the rapidly growing majority of Americans who now believe that we have ourselves mired in another Vietnam. And, of course, Bush continues to echo Johnson and Nixon, arguing we should 'stay the course'.

W. compared the war on terror to a World War the other day. So we're trying to fight the Iraq War and Vietnam at the same time? And even start to talk tough with Iran? Seems like these conflicts are getting a bit more serious than how they were originally sold to us.